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How have pornography normalized for children in the US?

If the reader is not aware of the internet controversies, I congratulate him. Chances are good that you are not mentally ill at a time when being mentally ill is normal. The problem is just that nobody is an island, so it’s good to know what’s going on in the world – especially with the younger generations. That’s why I say they were cursing Time magazine a lot on Twitter for using crazy pronouns to refer to someone who insists on being called crazy pronouns. The reader of this newspaper at this point already knows that the trans movement makes the workhorse “the pronouns”.

It is difficult to translate the polemic, because in Portuguese it would be more appropriate talk about endings than about pronouns, since we mark the gender much more in adjectives than in pronouns. An excerpt from the Time tweet that sparked the riot, in Portuguese, would read like this: “Time spoke to Maia Kobabe about your work”. Maia is evidently a feminine name, and in English we would expect the possessive pronoun “her”. In Portuguese, goes the “seu”, which is for men and women. (In more formal Portuguese, we would hardly read something like “Maia spoke about her work.”) On the other hand, “author and illustrator”, which is indifferent in English, would need to mark the genre in Portuguese: “author and illustrator”.

Since pronouns are what catches on in English and the craze began in the English-speaking world, the practice of militants is to display, whenever possible, the pronouns by which they want to be addressed. If his name is John and he is an ordinary man, he will put it like this: he/him, the personal pronoun and the masculine possessive pronoun. In a literal and arbitrary translation, ele/dele (it could be “he/your” too, but then it marks less the gender). As the militancy is not usually very literate or intelligent – ​​although it tends to be very educated, but that is another story – fashion immediately mattered. When you see an Instagram profile with the caption “she/her” or “he/him”, you can already know that you are progressive. The person is telling you what their “gender” is, because ideology dictates not to assume that someone is a man or a woman just because of their name or physical appearance. Political correctness says ask before you speak – a clear reversal of etiquette, as hesitating about someone’s gender is very embarrassing and offensive in a normal setting.

No -binaries

But calm down it gets worse. Trans is the person who wants to be of the opposite sex, correct? At first yes. Even a famous person, BBB, a signatory artist of the “letter for democracy”, the transvestite Linn da Quebrada, tattooed “she/her” on her forehead, claiming that it is for people to know how to treat her. As progressivism is always on the move, the thing has evolved and activists have decided that man and woman are just two genders among many possible ones. Gender is a spectrum – say the zucchini “experts” duly qualified in zucchini. At one extreme pole is the masculine gender and at the other the feminine. If you’re not a walking cliché (a Barbie dressed in pink or a macho man), then you’re probably something else. What else? Well, a “non-binary” (sic). A non-binary (sic) is entitled to a neutral pronoun. In Portuguese, they decided that it is “elu/delu” and that it is correct to say “elu é bonite”. (That is, they decided that the gender ending is -e, but these educated experts are not familiar with the concept of ending.) In English, the most common is to use “they/them” (singular, even). But of course, if there are a million possible genders between two points on a line, then of course there are a million possible pronouns (and endings) to correspond to each mysterious gender of that one. Here’s the fuss at Time, then: the person had a series of special pronouns for himself. And what was she? A non-binary asexual. What’s more, the article dealt with how happy she was that a judge had ruled that her children’s book was not pornography and therefore could remain in school libraries.

Huh?

Involuntary advertising against homeschooling

I read the censored book. The title is Gender Queer, is by 2019 and is an autobiography in comics. Little Maia was born in 89, the daughter of a vegetarian hippie couple who went to live in the middle of the woods when their two daughters were in their early childhood. The place had no electricity or running water. Her father is a school teacher in the Waldorf method. Walforf is a label adopted by expensive, rip-off schools. For further specifications, take two Engovs and deal with a pedagogue.

As the family lived in the bush, Maia’s only friend was a boy of the same age, the son of another hippie couple. What she says is that she didn’t have “gender roles imposed” by her parents, who didn’t obey them either. My way of describing the same fact is to say that her parents kept her in such a state of social isolation that she was left without the ability to acquire basic notions of life in society. So she had a real hard time understanding why little Adam next door wore different clothes than hers. She saw him naked and knew they both peed in different ways, because she squatted and he was standing. They feared snakes and bugs in the bathroom, so they relieved themselves on the floor. In the autobiography, Maia draws her father and mother listing characteristics, and claims that they were not adept at gender stereotypes. Her mother was a weaver, an embroiderer, she made brooms and prepared natural teas. Her father understood woodworking and played the guitar. Aside from the fact that her father has long hair and her mother doesn’t shave her legs (she was blonde and had fine hair), Maia’s parents are, yes, “gender role adherents”. All the apparent atypia is explained by their being hippies; the mother is not male and the father is not female. It just goes to show that she really doesn’t know what male and female clichés are.

At school

Maia and adãozinho only went to socialize with other children of their own age when they entered the first grade, in a Waldorf school. The boys didn’t let her fit in and she lost her only friend, who doesn’t appear in the teenage and adult stages of her life. She can’t fit in with the girls either and wants to pass as a boy. Most of the time, she succeeds, and she is happy about it. She had long hair, cut by her own mother, but many boys also had long hair.

Maia doesn’t go into detail about her pre-pubescent anxieties. She was sad that everyone knew “everything”, but she didn’t know anything. In the midst of this “everything” was what she should have learned at school with her classmates: she reached the age of illiterate, the only one in her class. Things would only change with the advent of Harry Potter, who would encourage her to read. (Harry Potter was also a shunned weirdo, by the way.)

A subsequent change was menstruation. At first she wanted to hide it even from her mother, but she needed help. Still, she’d spent days in a single mod, embarrassed by her period, and today she doesn’t know how she didn’t get an infection. All the information she had about menstruation was obtained through the character Alanna The Lioness, a warrior who didn’t like to menstruate.

It’s not just about the physiological characteristics linked to the female sex that Maia has difficulties. Her parents didn’t even inform her about using deodorants. She started to fit in at school when an LGBT group appeared to support students. There she found herself in the company, even if her sex life was limited to fantasizing. She fantasized sometimes with girls, sometimes with boys, and thanks to that she was able to consider herself bisexual. The group of teenagers gathered other weirdos who liked fantastic literature. They would meet to discuss which actors from The Lord of the Rings were gay. At that time, the board sought her out and informed her of the need to use deodorants. She asked her mother to buy it and talked to her about it. As an adult, she is unhappy with the fact that she was snitched on to the board – and not with the fact that her mother allowed her to walk around stinky, without instructions.

Even at that time , Maia starts reading gay comics, which she equates (cf. p. 25) to porn comics. In fact, she is amazed that her friends don’t like “gay comics.” She exclaims, “I thought gay porn was universal!”

She starts to get turned on – and, she assumes, have non-physical orgasms – with sex between men. Her biggest expectation – obviously unrealizable – is to receive oral sex on the penis she would like to have. It is not clear when she started having access to pornography, but at she already fantasized about the idea of ​​having a penis.

Sexuality and Adulthood

Maia has a terrible difficulty with the physical traits characteristic of femininity, namely, breasts and the vagina. Over the course of life, it only gets worse. She dreams of having the “top surgery”, that is, a double mastectomy, and sees, albeit with a guilty conscience, how lucky women who have breast cancer and need to have their breasts removed. As for the vagina, she had two gynecological exams in her life. In the first she was horrified to be penetrated by a speculum. On a second trip, as an adult, she was so nervous that the gynecologist sent her back medicated. She took an anxiolytic to do the exam, but she still did it in tears and was traumatized.

She herself doesn’t even put her finger in her vagina. She is disgusted with her own vagina and that of others too. From the account, she seems to have never approached an erect penis in her life.

When she entered high school, she discovered transsexuality pages and kept seeing things about it in the Tumblr. In the end, she concluded that she was a non-binary transsexual, as she did not want to be a man, but rather to not be a woman. She fantasized about the idea that she would have an identical twin brother who does the girly things she doesn’t. She is very obsessed with herself; she methodically notes the books she reads and notes when she masturbates (without sticking her finger). She masturbated less and less until she concluded that she was asexual.

At 25 years old, in college, she wrote fanfics and felt a lack of sexual experience. She had never even kissed on the mouth – except as a child, when she kissed the little adam. She downloaded Tinder and ended up finding a girlfriend who consented not to involve vaginas in the relationship. She simulated oral sex with a fake penis and, unsurprisingly, felt nothing.

Today, supposedly, she is a happy, fulfilled person who uses “Spivak pronouns” , is asexual and non-binary. Because hers is a success story, she wrote it to help other children with gender identity issues. On the last page, she puts a note for the parents: “Although I had a lot of difficulties being your daughter [daughter, feminino], I am very, very happy to be your child [child, sem gênero determinado].”

Abigail Shrier is right

Of course, what is most surprising about this whole story is the celebration – more than the normalization – of an unhappy and suffering life, the result of many educational mistakes. And if the beginning of the book is an unwitting propaganda against homeschooling, the fact that these parents are teachers (the preschool mother school, the school father) ends up being counterbalanced by anti-school propaganda. School should be a lifeline for children with misfit parents, but in the end it is precisely the misfits who put themselves at the forefront of early childhood education. The author is so maladjusted that I highly doubt she knows how to distinguish pornography from material appropriate for children. Worst of all is that I believe in the author’s good faith. She can’t get a gynecological exam, but she feels very well resolved because she has self-labeled a non-binary asexual and, in fact, is celebrated for it in an influential medium.

The book is also an eloquent proof that Abigail Shrier is absolutely right. Her book Irreversible Damage 2019 said this: girls are becoming trans at puberty because they have difficulty socializing, because they have access to pornography, because hate their own bodies and spend too much time looking at bullshit on the internet. Besides, they don’t even want to be men; they just want to stop being women and live in a kind of infantile cocoon forever.

In this context, Maia’s only exceptionality is her age. Her parents were the vanguard of the tragedy that is knocking at the door.

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